Episode 17 - Finding Your 'Why'
In today’s episode, We’ll discover and define our ‘why’!
Find the full show notes for this episode at RecoveringCorpoholics.com/17.
Each one of us has a ‘why’. It’s not a statement of who we are, or who we aspire to be, but it states what sets our soul on fire and how we stand out. It’s OUR story.
Ever wonder what your reason is for getting up every day? Well today it might be to wake up to go to work as you need the paycheck but after this week, we’ll be getting out of bed each day to fulfill our ‘why’!
Some of us spend all of our days searching for our “‘why’”, some of us stumble upon it while looking, and others know exactly what it is.
Every scenario is OK as long as we are actively looking for our ‘why’ and continuing to grow.
If you don’t think you know what your ‘why’ is, that is OK! The only thing I will ask of you is to open your mind and try new things and explore new possibilities until you find it.
When you feel stuck and think ‘I’ll never have a ‘why’ or I’ll never find my purpose, what you are doing is closing your mind to so many possibilities. So, open your mind, open your heart and be willing to explore this for you.
And for all your corporate over achievers, who think their ‘why’ isn’t good enough - your ‘why’ doesn’t have to be perfect!! There are no wrong or right answers in this work so stop comparing yourself and your ‘why’ to others.
Some people’s ‘why’ may to feed the hungry or to make money and your ‘why’ could be to travel the world, understand all cultures. They are all beautiful and unique.
So, why is your ‘why’ important?
Knowing your ‘why’ is an important first step to achieving the goals that excite you and creating a life you want to be living (versus merely surviving!).
When you know your ‘‘why’’, you’ll be able to find the courage to task risks, the motivation and passion to keep going and that will move your life into a new world.
For example, I know my ‘why’ and that is to ensure that no one ever feels alone in their career journey. And what I learned of how I can live and be my ‘why’ is to coach.
And now that I am clear on that this is my life’s work, doing something else is no longer an option for me. This lights me up, I love each day and I want the same for you.
So, how can you find your ‘why’?
I believe there are two ways. The first way is to do a lot of inner work to help you discover your ‘why’. You may have heard of this method before.
Ikigai, is a Japanese concept that will help you discover your ‘why’ by finding the point between the following: your passion, your skills, your calling and your career.
The second way is fast and my favorite and that’s just by breaking down your thoughts.
Let’s start with the first way. I’m going to ask you four questions which I want you to make four different lists.
1A. First, I want you to think back to the times when you felt on top or when you felt alive. Whether that was achieving something or helping others or whatever the case, you likely have experienced the power of Your ‘why’ in your life.
This is the feeling of energy, determination, courage, focus - all combined to make something happen. Your mission was clear, the goal was compelling. You were in the zone! This is why having a ‘why’ will make you feel all the time!!
It was a feeling in your gut, something that made you feel passionate and unstoppable.
1B. The second thing I want you to do is think about your strengths and what your good at. When you do work that you’re good at, you’re not only more productive, you’re usually more fulfilled, too. So, what are the skills/tasks that come easy to you?
And to note, if you have skills, you’re good at that you’re not passionate about, forget about it It’s not the right path. For example. I know I am good at finance work but I have zero passion for it even though I know I can make a lot of money doing it.
So, think about that while you’re making your lists.
1C. The third thing I want you to think about what it is that you bring to the table and what you think helps the world. Not just strengths here, but everything - Your education, experience, problems you like solving.
1D. And Lastly, I want you to think about what you can do that will make you money.
I love coaching but I also need to make money to support my family. It just doesn’t work for me to coach for free. Now I do sometimes pro bono but that is different.
If you love something so much, think about how you can make money from it, don’t just discredit it.
In summary, I just asked you 4 questions, what do you love doing, what are your strengths, what does the world need that you can help and what can you earn money doing.
Take your answers from those questions and see where the overlap is.
Now for the second method of finding your ‘why’ – and you may need to work with a coach on this but I will take you through the exercise.
I want you to start off with what you think your ‘‘why’’ is. Then I want you to break down ‘why’ that’s important to you as many times as possible, at least 6, until you get to the core of it.
For example, your ‘why’ might look like:
I want to help people lose weight. Well, why is that important to you?
I was heavy once and it took me years to lose the weight. I want to help people do it faster. Why’?
Well, I had to learn so much and I had no one to help me. Why?
I never shared with anyone the struggle I went through and it was a battle every day. Why?
Because I didn’t have anyone do it with. Why?
Because I didn’t think people were going through the same things as me and I was embarrassed of what I thought about myself. Why?
Because I had failed so many times in the past. Why?
Because I had no idea what I was doing and scared that this was it. Why?
Because I felt alone and like a failure, that I was always going to be this way as I could never do it.
There may be a couple items overlapping but do you see what I am trying to get at?
See you don’t just want to help people lose weight. You want to help people who feel alone, who struggle with body image, who have failed before to finally have the power to love themselves and to achieve their goals.
To support them and be on the journey with them. Now what is more powerful, that or I want to help people lose weight.
For me, is it that I want to help people with their careers or that I never want people to feel alone and stuck in their careers like I did. My ‘why’ drives me out of bed, it hurts me to think about how many people are in the position I used to be in.
Now, once you find your ‘why’, it may be hard to do anything else so I will give you this tip to help you while you transition or to find meaning and your ‘why’ in what you’re doing to find motivation.
For example, maybe you are working a totally unrelated job than what you want, and having a ‘why’ for your work will help you find fulfillment.
When I was starting out, I was working in the finance industry. However, my ‘why’ was to ensure that no one ever feels alone in their journey.
So, I turned that into ensuring my teammates never feel like they have all the work on their plate. How I can make them feel more appreciated. That made my transition out, so much more powerful for me.
Find your ‘why’, find your ‘why’ in everything you do. It gives you more power and makes life that much more exciting.
With that said, let’s get to work! I can’t wait to hear your ‘why’!
Stay inspired and live powerfully!
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